Those were some very interesting points on the topic of empathy as it relates to a D/s or M/s dynamic.
My take on this is that a Dominant or Master has to have empathy for his submissive or slave, otherwise why would he even be with her? Would I really want to be with someone who couldn't feel for my own plight, or ignored my needs, while truly only serving his own? Granted, we should care more about those we serve more than ourselves, but should we also starve ourselves of the freedom to express ourselves, or the freedom to have our own feelings and opinions on things? I know, no one wants to admit that it can happen to them, but then bam, it has, so you have to deal with it somehow.
I also agree that arranged marriages did seem to have a safety net for the people involved, yet for women or men who seek online first, before real time, there is a much greater risk of not really having the opinions of those you love. Maybe, some find part of the thrill in talking to someone you barely know, but it can get annoying after awhile, and not feeling that you really know the person is a good way to defeat the trust in a relationship before it has even begun.
I would like to make a comment on the following quote from the article, which deserves true thought and reflection:
"But how much more difficult is it for a submissive woman than a Dom to admit that a relationship once started is no longer desired by her? By her very submissive nature, she may be unlikely to speak out or force the issue, and the dominant partner may prolong a somewhat deficient situation if he is able to glean some of what he wants from the relationship by insistence on things being done his way."
I can say with certainty that this happens quite often, that a Dominant or Master might prolong a bad situation for the submissive or slave just so he can keep being served, without being "empathetic" or conscientious of the damage he is doing. I think it should fall on a Dominant's shoulders to correct this issue, but if he is unwilling to face reality, then I think it is perfectly acceptable for a submissive or slave to bring these issues up. He might not have agreed to provide everything, but he did agree to the basic human tenets, right? So, if one of those tenets is not met, then even as property, you have the right to say that he is not taking care of you, but is rather throwing you around like some old teddy bear. It needs to be addressed if it's a concern that greatly affects your happiness.
Let me stress this again, you may care more for your Master's happiness than your own, but if he is just trying to "glean" extra things because he can, yet you are unhappy, you have the right to walk away. If he doesn't seem to have any empathy for you at all, you may be in an abusive relationship; remember some men are excellent manipulators and can twist your feelings around in all kinds of unhealthy ways. As a submissive, you have to be willing to admit that he may not be the best Dominant or Master for you. Never be ashamed to put a stop to something that is making you unhappy.
Does having a dominant personality make one a Dominant? I think, in many cases, no.
Just because I am humbled, does this make me without worth?
Save yourself frustration and set down the boundaries. If you allow people to walk all over you, not even in the doormat way, most people will extend to you a general disrespect if you let them. So, as the submissive, don't be afraid to tell people your views and don't be afraid to take the first steps to end something negative or harmful to your self-esteem. Remember, as much as you want the perfect Dominant to come into your life, if your self-esteem is shot, well... most men don't look too favorably upon that from any woman, assertive or not.
Remember that empathy is usually a two-way street. If only one person has it, then things probably won't last much longer than a short-term stint. It's not wrong to want empathy; it is human nature to seek it in others. What I find against nature is the people who say they want to be cut off from emotions or only want to use logic. While logic does have its place, it is not the measure of the human heart.
Empathy is a good thing. It reminds us that someone cares for us and that we care for them. Without empathy, we are doomed to an empty life of flailing in a sea of doubt, disbelief, denial, disillusionment.
Finally, please keep in mind: in order to have empathy for another, you have to respect them first.
